English
Abnormales
“He is normally abnormal!” Clarisse (name on ID: Paul) said while biting into an unidentified piece of seafood hors d’oeuvre.
“Who’s that?” Jonofi (name on ID: John) asked.
“That Robert. Can you believe that he’s never in his life done amnesa?”
“No! The dude is really wack. How you know him?” Onardo (name on ID: Leon) wanted to know.
“Unfortunately we work together, he in stocks, me in funds. The dude admitted that he tried weed once back in school. And that’s all.”
“Who are you hanging out with, Clarisette?” Onardo groaned.
“My sympathy,” Jonofi added and just for practice took a shot of amnesa from the cheese-and-drugs board.
And Kudupi (name on ID: Kudupi) just sat, smoked plimon and said nothing. He was like that – he wanted to have the big moment all for himself.
They ordered a round of Just Another Reason to Get Hard Drugs (whisky with ice). The evening at the Stop Deviation restaurant was promising to be a hot one.
“But you know what, this is nothing. Recently I met a guy at a party over at San Barenakedino’s.”
“Oh yeah? San Barenakedino? How’s he?” Clarisse and Onardo both asked.
“Normal. Crashed his car, and is banging Lora in Drojeda. But not about him, only about this one sackless Jacek. Posing as a normales, too, that asstard.’
“How?” Kudupi asked and everyone suddenly noticed.
“Yo Kud, wassup? You’re talking?” Clarissesetto said.
“A momentary lack of brain power,” Kudupi hissed quietly, took a shot of chrynine and washed it down with his drink, “So?”
“What so? So, this Jacek, he walks around and says he has only one woman.”
“No!”
“You kiddin’”
“No, I tell ya, and then he says who that woman is…”
“I can’t listen to this. Don’t! Stop!” Onardo snorted, because he liked to snort from time to time.
“But you know!”
“We know, we know. Don’t ruin the evening, Jonofi. Do they have kids already?” Kudupi asked a trick question.
“No, now I’m not playing! I wasn’t supposed to say, and you, Kudu, now you said it for real, so I’m not playing. This wasn’t supposed to be like this, why do you always have to bring everything back to a phallus, huh!”
“Either way, disgusting. How can these people have the balls to walk the streets? I dunno.”
“Totally cukoo,” Kudupi began and they all knew he was about to drop the bomb.
“Just be careful with the detonation range, cuz I just had a stuffed snout with gorgonzola,” Clarissesettessimo laughed. Everybody liked Kudupi’s stories. They were always the randiest and broke every taboo.
“So, c’mon Kudu! You started, you finish!” Jonofi was getting impatient.
“The dude’s name is Michal, and he’s a noob like I’ve never met before,” Kudu slowly drawled his words with care and precision, like “cision” in the word “precision”. The climax was inevitably coming soon, and the group at the table next to theirs was all ears, too, in the anticipation of a pathologically deviant story.
“?” Jonofi stared.
“??” Clarissesesettisimoprimo stared.
“?!” Onardo, supported by the fixated eyes from the table next to theirs, tried to force a quick answer.
“Do you know what time this doofus has breakfast?” Kudu began to build the suspense, aided by a gulp of tatamamina.
“At eight in the morning.”
It took both tables almost three sessions of medium sized cheese-and-drugs boards to collect themselves after hearing this.
Finally, the orchestra of trained zoo employees managed to clear the atmosphere full of feelings of disgust caused the pathology of living in a big city.
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Loading ...#vss Ron asked everybody to look at him in augmented view. –”You know, you can see my soul, my heart and how to make a donation.”
That was it. The whole story. Read here about Twitter-based literature tagged #vss.
(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...#1picstory :: New buzz in town
To see all One Picture Stories, please check Flickr or Mobypicture photostreams.
(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...Weekly links on mobile e-books & self publishing 06.02.2010
- iTablet launches in the UK. This is uncanny…February 5, 2010Well this is awkward. A UK company has launched a range of Windows or Linux-based tablets and branded it the iTablet. A screenshot can be found to the right, and while it’s hardly likely to have Jobs knees wobbling, it doesn’t look all that bad. Due to start shipping in April 2010, it runs Windo...
- Sony hints at iPad competitorFebruary 4, 2010The Apple iPad may have disappointed some that expected the device to do and offer more. Most gadget fans can find something that they like about the iPad. The device will be shipping soon and we will see how well the buying public responds to the price and features of the iPad. Sony has dropped a...
- E-reader statisfaction study shows 93 percent of users are happy, just not youFebruary 4, 2010The wind sure changes very quickly, eh? Just a week ago the University of Georgia revealed that many of its study participants -- Athens residents who were given a Kindle to play with -- weren't happy with their e-reader experience, but yesterday a new study reported something fairly contrasting. Ra...
- iPhone Apps Get Web PreviewsFebruary 4, 2010Back in November, Apple quietly rolled out iTunes Preview, which created a web-based page for iTunes albums and song tracks. Earlier this year, the company added song samples to iTunes Preview, further fueling speculation of a web-based iTunes client. Today, the company is completing the circuit, so...
- Is it vanity to self-publish?February 4, 2010It's hard to say when respectable, even sensible ambition, shades into hollow ego-trippingI still remember the rising excitement as I ripped open the envelope. The letter inside glowed with praise for my work. "At last," I thought, "somebody has 'got' what I'm trying to do with my writing. A real L...
- Polish author finds “reading devices” is inapropriate langageFebruary 1, 2010Polish author Piotr Kowalczyk has found out something very interesting. This is from his English language blog Password Incorrect: I opened last week a little Amazon store at my blog, where I list products which fit my interests. Today I was trying to create a Listmania list with e-reading devices...
- Wattpad Annouces iPad-Optimized AppFebruary 3, 2010Wattpad, the eBook-based social network, sounded what's likely to be a very, er, popular note yesterday, announcing an iPad-optimized version of its iPhone app. Wattpad says the optimized app will be available concurrently with the iPad launch at the end of March. Ivan Yuen, CTO of Wattpad, said...
- Google Chrome Tablet vs. iPad: Open vs. ClosedFebruary 4, 2010There's talk that one of the things up Google's increasingly packed sleeve is a tablet PC built to run Google's upcoming Chrome OS. Yesterday, ReadWriteWeb posted a comparison between what Google would offer with a Chrome tablet and what Apple is promising with its iPad. Basically, the difference...
- Is the Apple vs. Amazon eBook Battle Going to be Vicious? Stanza Forced to Remove USB Book Sharing FeatureFebruary 3, 2010Did you know that Amazon has two ebook reader apps for the iPhone? The first app released was not the Kindle for iPhone app. The first ebook reader app released was... Stanza ...although Amazon didn't buy its parent company (Lexcycle) until after its initial release (company purhcased in April 200...
- How many apps do you use?February 4, 2010How many applications that you have installed on your phone do you regularly use? I have installed 31 applications on my T-Mobile myTouch phone, of which I probably use 6 on a regular basis. The counts do not include the Android built-in applications that I also use on a daily basis. Like most peopl...
- Stanza eBook App Forced By Apple To Remove Book Sharing FeatureFebruary 2, 2010Users of the popular Stanza e-book reading app for iPhone can no longer move books to their PC with a USB cable. In an updated version to its Stanza app, Amazon Inc.-owned developer Lexcycle said Apple required the company to remove a function that allowed USB file transfer.
- Gil Laroya: Does Technology Replace Humanity?February 3, 2010Something that I've always feared about technology and social interaction, is what it brings us, versus what it takes away. With all of the cool features, gadgets and innovations that come with technology, "how" you ask "can technology take things away?". It's as simple as this -- technology dumbs d...
- Textbook Publishers Embrace iPad Apps for EducationFebruary 3, 2010Textbook publishers have already enlisted the third-party services of developers to build adaptations of textbooks for the iPad, the Wall Street Journal reports. McGraw-Hill, Houghton Mifflin, Pearson and Kaplan have struck deals with iPhone and iPod touch developers ScrollMotion Inc. to build appli...
- Amazon Said to Buy Touch Start-UpFebruary 4, 2010The Internet retailer has acquired Touchco, a New York start-up, according to a person briefed on the deal.
- Entelligence: Lessons from the iPad launchFebruary 1, 2010Entelligence is a column by technology strategist and author Michael Gartenberg, a man whose desire for a delicious cup of coffee and a quality New York bagel is dwarfed only by his passion for tech. In these articles, he'll explore where our industry is and where it's going -- on both micro and ma...
- How the iPad is Changing Interaction DesignFebruary 1, 2010Applications that looked amazing on larger multi-touch experiences like Microsoft Surface may have a more affordable consumer-facing counterpart. While the iPad has been widely criticized, many startups are thrilled by its possibilities. In mid-November we featured Paris-based Pearltrees as a new de...
- 5 Essential Tools for the Mobile JournalistFebruary 1, 2010The multi-function playground that is the smartphone has shrunk the capabilities of a van-sized 1970’s news team into the pocket of a single reporter. Today, front-page news can stream from any individual with a cell phone camera and a Twitter account, as it did during Iran’s election protests l...
- Random rules for ideas worth spreadingJanuary 31, 2010If you've got an idea worth spreading, I hope you'll consider this random assortment of rules. Like all rules, some are made to be broken, but still... You can name your idea anything you like, but a google-friendly name is always better than one that isn't. Don't plan on appearing on a reality sh...
- Too much data leads to not enough beliefJanuary 21, 2010Business plans with too much detail, books with too much proof, politicians with too much granularity... it seems as though more data is a good thing, because data proves the case.In my experience, data crowds out faith. And without faith, it's hard to believe in the data enough to make a leap. Big...
- How To Create a Detailed Apple iPad Icon in PhotoshopFebruary 1, 2010The Internet world exploded with the news of the Apple tablet launch last week. Named the iPad, it’s set to bring yet another revolution to the way people access and browse the web. An iPad icon would be a sensible addition to any web designer’s resources toolbox, so let’s fire up Photoshop an...
- Plugin by C. Murray Consulting
(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...#vss From 698 billion tweets, Laura has found this perfect one. “What I most like about it is that it’s so random.”
That was it. The whole story. Read here about Twitter-based literature tagged #vss.
(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...All-in-One EveryToy
A few days ago a new toy appeared in stores.
It was a doll, or rather a robot doll with exchangeable parts, similar in concept to Kolego blocks, but bigger, more ergonomic and resembling realistic organs, which allowed for better chances of creative playtime. On its head, under the helmetphone and Busy Bee antennae, with an option for four antennas in the Blebletubby style, there was a blond mop of hair a la Dark Powder. The wings, fully extendable into two laser-plasmatic Chronicle series cannons, had changeable colorful modules, which offered possibilities for a game similar to MasterBlind, and a crate on the chain-mail jacket allowed for an intellectual challenge characteristic of the Kubic cube.
The modular construction offered practically unlimited possible combinations in creating a new character, and several suggested on the back of the box gave a taste of this incredible action-figure adventure: Rambie 3, Winnie the Poohman, Donald Potter, or Atomic Ostrich.
Its changeable boots (there were seven pairs in the set, with a possibility to buy 23 more) presented yet another arena to show off young creative talents. They provided for the abilities of either Ninja Hurdles, or Puss in Boots, or even an M1 Abrams tank. Additionally, thanks to the built-in mini-engines, the toy could negotiate obstacles – depending on the boots – either by crawling, jumping, walking sideways, pirouetting, or in the down-up fashion. The built-in internal organs allowed for the development of care-giving skills (activities: peeing, internal absorption, indigestion, stomach-ache). A 2 GB memory mini-chip was sufficient to teach the toy the basics of one of four languages, including sign language, and the reset button hidden in the left armpit afforded multiple opportunities at developing verbal communication with the toy. To make the play possibilities even more interesting and unpredictable, under the left wrist, there was a built-in operational panel with a choice of setting levels of aggression, bravery, childishness, obedience, intelligence and the need to spend time with a child diagnosed with ADHD.
Mr. Emil Czyc was just shopping with his son at the mall.
“Bartus, look! EveryToy.”
“Eh, not for me.”
“Eh?”
(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...6 months old iPad’s commercial [video]
College Humor guys made iPad’s commercial last summer. They just mistakenly called it Kindle 3.
(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...#1picstory :: Social Guru Jack
(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...An organic mobile phone [video]
Wow, this guy has a vision. Bringing a mobile phone closer to human. Would love to try it. An idea with changing a weight is particularly interesting. Must be a weird feeling.
Weird feelings – this is what humans are expecting from technology, isn’t it?
(No Ratings Yet) Loading ...“Reading devices” – inappropriate language for Amazon
I opened last week a little Amazon store at my blog, where I list products which fit my interests. Today I was trying to create a Listmania list with e-reading devices available at Amazon.
The thing is that it was not possible to publish it. A terrible line “Sorry! Inappropriate language was used” appeared every time after I pressed a “Publish list” button. Originally I filled with information every field. Then got rid of everything except a title. Checked “eReaders”, “E-book readers”, “e-Reading devices” and a couple of other options. Finally I used “Reading devices” – which is Kindle’s original description. You see the result. »»»
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Polish tech-absurdist and mobile fiction writer 3.0 beta. Addicted to ebooks and technology. Guest writer at 
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